


I'll not leave you here

by papyrus4sirus



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Father-Son Relationship, Force Ghosts, Gen, Star Wars: The Force Awakens Spoilers, this was a long time coming
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-03-08
Packaged: 2018-05-17 14:21:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5873851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/papyrus4sirus/pseuds/papyrus4sirus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of one-shots focusing on interactions between Luke Skywalker and Anakins force ghost. The stories won't necessarily follow a chronological order but will highlight important eras and events. Later chapters will include other characters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Old misfortunes

"Father, I can't." Luke's words are fraught with despair.

 

"Luke, you know what I've been through, what the dark side does." Anakin beseeches quietly, watching his sons profile with concern.

 

"But this is different." Luke sounds so young, the way he might have as a child had Anakin known him then. But the man before him is aged, weary. It seems cruel that Anakins form should appear young in contrast, resembling the visage he possessed before Darth Vader took over, before Luke was born.

 

"It is no different. The mercy is that you were spared from witnessing firsthand some of my more deplorable actions..." the words hang ugly in the air. “I wish I could have saved you from that anguish, saved you both from it.”

 

"I can't face what Ben has done, it's my fault." Luke's blue eyes seem to age him more than the lines forming at their corners.

 

“You know this isn't true, son. If anyone is to blame it's me… and my weaknesses. They plagued me in my life and now in death as well....” Anakin cannot shield the bitter tone in his voice. “Ben is misled by my folly, my darkness. What I renounced for the sake of your life and light is lost on him entirely.... I've tried to reach him, pull him towards his true potential."

 

"I cannot bear this." Luke cries suddenly, his voice cracking. 

 

Anakin seats himself across from Luke, uncertain how to proceed. Anakin knows he hadn't truly been a father except for in his dying moments. These feeble attempts at parenting in his ghostly youthful form seem a paltry trick. He wishes for so much more for his son, to be so much more. Anakin folds his hands in his lap and leans forward.

 

"I will continue to reach out to Ben. He has faith in me, though misguided and altered it is there. I remain hopeful." Anakin needs Luke to know he means it.

 

Luke remains somber. "Then you do what I cannot." With a weary sigh Luke stands and exits the room. He does not want to be consoled. The weight of the world is on his shoulders and he needs to acknowledge his faults, despite his father’s imploring.

 

Luke had saved his father, a fact that Anakin still whispers fervently to him time and time again, but who will save Ben? Luke had so far failed in that front and as a result the younglings had died; such senseless death and wasted potential.

 

 

Though Luke has left the room, his ache resounds in the force. Anakin knows he is no help in this moment, as irrefutably useless to Luke now as he had been his whole mortal life.


	2. Above the shore

“Luke, you saved me. _Never_  forget that.”

He can sense his father’s spirit behind him peering over his shoulder, watching the ocean as Luke himself is doing. Anakin’s hand reaches out to clutch Luke’s shoulder. But like every attempt before it, Luke does not feel his grasp. He only knows his father reached for him when he feels the disconsolate emotion resonating in the force. The two of them make a sad pair.

Anakin sighs. “How long will you stay in seclusion?”  

“As long as I feel it is right.”

“They’re worried about you, Luke. Just as I am.”

Luke turns to meet his father’s gaze. Anakin almost looks angry.

“I feel Han’s loss; I feel Leia’s grief… I know I have to do something.”

Anakin sees the indecision starkly on Luke’s face.

“I will handle it.” Anakin says before disappearing. Luke doesn’t know what his father means; he turns his gaze back to the sea with a sense of foreboding.  

~~

At the rebel base Artoo finds himself inexplicably being coaxed out of his low power mode. Anakin watches with delight as the droids piece together Luke’s location for a room full of eager eyes.

 ~~

When Luke senses Rey’s presence on the island, he knows what his father has done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> But what if a force ghost is responsible for R2's 'awakening'?


	3. Forest moon

Luke Skywalker, _his son_ , is beaming up at him with a smile that would take his breath away were he still a mortal man. Anakin watches the merry making, feels the jubilation of a thousand planets in the force. Obi-Wan and Yoda are beside him and he can’t believe he’s been granted this great favor. He feels the light in him finally recovered from the darkness that had festered for twenty odd years.  

The night is long but Anakin is glad to linger. In the early hours of the morning when most have finally succumbed to sleep, Luke seeks him near the edges of the forest.

A shy grin accompanies Luke’s words, “I hoped you were still near.”

“And I hoped you would look for me.” The admission is so unlike Darth Vader yet it’s every bit the sum of Anakin Skywalker. The realization is stunning.

Luke’s expression becomes serious. “I want more than just this happy encounter on Endor, I want a whole lifetime, or at least what’s left of my time.” The passion behind Luke’s request ignites Anakin’s resolve.

“I swear to you Luke, if it is within my power I will visit with you as often as I can for as long as I can. I may have missed the crucial moments of your childhood…” Anakin pauses before continuing, “But I _will_ be there for your maturity, even your old age if I have my say.”

Luke can’t help the unabashed joy he feels. This was the man he had always imagined his father to be; this was every moment he’d dared to hope for when he was a small child on Tatooine whispering earnestly to the stars. Though he could not wrap his arms around his father as he had so often pictured, seeing his spirit radiating light before him was more than enough.

“We have an awful lot of catching up to do.” Luke points out.

“There is time for it.” Anakin says resolutely, completely in awe of the emotions manifesting in the force, inside him, between them and all around.  

 


	4. The Parallels

 

Anakin watches from the edges of the forest as Ben lays in pain and defeat, the snow falling gently into his open wounds. The setting may be different but Anakin can’t help but notice a parallel between the scene before him and Mustafar. What burned hot and red instead glows cold and bright.  

 

Anakin studies the wound on Ben’s face and decides it _might_ scar. His manipulation of his old lightsaber away from Ben’s grasp and into Rey’s had been a coarse resolution, though it had been necessary. Anakin wishes for other solutions, ways in which this could unfold easily for the young force users.

 

The grief of what Ben’s done is palpable within the force. Anakin attempts once more to reach Ben with a careful caress from the light. He watches anxiously as Ben’s breath stutters in recognition. A moment later Ben is clutching his bleeding face and from behind his trembling hands Anakin hears sobbing.

 

Remorse crawls up Anakin’s stomach, though the emotion is muted and much more bearable than it had been when he was mortal. The conflict he sees laid out before him is achingly familiar. Before Anakin can decide on how best to proceed, General Hux and two Stormtroopers are gathering the distraught man and whisking him away from the eroding landscape.

 

It seems as though the planet is mocking Anakin as he departs. But he has been through much, too much in fact to let the notion of a doomed bloodline destroy what he has become. The truth is that he _is_ one with the force and in the breadth of the universe there are infinite opportunities for absolution.


	5. Looking at reflections

“I could do it,” Luke says ardently, “train a new generation of force sensitive younglings.”

Anakin is looking at the setting sun from Luke’s window.

“You could.” He concedes quietly.

“I hardly know where to begin…I only learned so much from Yoda and Ben.”

“I can help you.” Anakin says, resolved to help his son in this endeavor.

Anakin turns to see Luke’s hopeful gaze.

“Obi-Wan and Yoda can help too.” Anakin assures softly.

Luke searches his father’s face, catches a glimpse of an indescribable emotion there.

“Thank you, father.” Luke is radiating now, his smile infectious as he springs up from his seat and approaches his father’s ghostly form.

Anakin watches with a grin that falters only marginally when Luke hesitates in front of him. The physical limitations of their relationship is something neither of them has adapted well to despite it being the cornerstone of their unique bond.

Luke looks sheepish for a moment and ducks his head. Anakin watches his son and finds he has no words to give. They both yearn for a reality neither will be a part of.

Suddenly Luke extends his hand out, as if he means to somehow use the force on his father, but nothing happens. Anakin understands in an instant and lifts his own hand. Their palms are nearly touching now; Luke appears determined while Anakin closes the distance.

Luke’s breath hitches for a fraction and then he realizes he feels nothing. Not a shimmer in the force, not the hint of a breeze nor a cold sensation.

“Did you feel anything?” Luke asks anxiously.

“No.” Anakin admits, “but do not despair. We must be grateful for what we have and I have so much more than I ever dared hope for. You’ve given me that.”

Luke smiles at his father’s words.

“Besides.” Anakin smirks, “We have the force.”

Anakin reaches out with the force, providing a tendril of comfort to Luke’s mind which envelops him very nearly like a hug only noticeably different.

Luke chuckles and looks up.

“I’m grateful for what we have, father.”


End file.
